Elizabeth "Betty" Deaton

GLENDIVE, MONTANA: Elizabeth Mary "Betty" Deaton, age 97, passed away on Thursday, June 18, 2009 at the Eastern Montana Veterans Home in Glendive. A Life Tribute Service will be held at 10:00 A.M. on Thursday, July 2, 2009 in the Chapel of the Silvernale-Silha Funeral Home in Glendive with Celebrant Sandy Silha officiating. Interment was held in the Sunset Memorial Gardens Cemetery in Billings, Montana. Silvernale-Silha Funeral Home of Glendive has been entrusted with the arrangements. Betty was born on June 17, 1912 the daughter of Sandor and Mary (Sakoi) Bucsis at Willowbrook, Saskatchewan. After her mothers death Betty moved to Billings with her Aunt and Uncle, Irene and Walter Ross. Betty completed her education in Billings graduating with the class of 1929. After High School Betty attended Beauty School. Betty married Joseph Cissel in Billings in 1937. Joseph passed away in 1942. Betty married Robert E. Deaton on December 8, 1943 in Billings. Betty and Robert moved to Laurel, Montana where she fixed hair and raised her son while Robert was overseas during World War II. After the war they moved back to Billings where she was a devoted wife and mother. Betty had been a member of the VFW Auxiliary since 1946, holding many offices at the state and local level. Betty really enjoyed cooking and was known for her exceptional hamburger dumpling soup and lemon pie. She is preceded in death by her parents, two husbands, four brothers and two sisters. Survivors include: one son, Vern Deaton and his wife Karen of Glendive; three grandchildren, Doug Deaton and his wife Judi of Prairie Dusac, Wisconsin, Amby Wilfong and her husband John of Newburg, Oregon, Cullen Deaton and his wife Aleida of Hemet, California; five great grandchildren, Brianna Hannon, Katrina Deaton, Logan Deaton, Travis Wilfong and Alaena Wilfong; three step great grandchildren, Aleida Newhouse, Jesus Betancourt, Enrique Betancourt; one great great grandchild, Amelia Hannon; four step great great grandchildren one sister Margaret Shibley of Ontario, Canada, and one brother-in-law, Donald Cissel and his wife Joann of Idaho Falls, Idaho; numerous nieces and nephews and special cousin Marjorie Ross of Billings. Remembrances and condolences may be shared with the family at: www.silvernale-silhafuneralhome.com Elizabeth Mary “Betty” Deaton Life Tribute Service July 2, 2009 Song: “In the Garden” Welcome: Master of Ceremonies Video Tribute Eulogy: Celebrant “Remember me in your heart, in your thoughts; hold close the memories of the times we loved, the memories of the times we shared. For if you always think of me, I will never be gone.” (Author unknown) Elizabeth “Betty” Deaton touched many lives in her 97 years of living. According to her nephew, Dick Bucsis, Betty’s biggest contribution to her world was her happy-go-lucky and cheerful disposition that embraced everyone around her. Betty will be remembered for having an open and welcoming heart. Betty was not one to talk or tell stories about her past or her growing up years; she preferred to live in and enjoy the moment. But from what is known, Betty’s childhood had its share of sadness and turmoil. One story told is quite unique. Betty died when she was 6 years old. Betty was a victim of the flu. An epidemic went through and both Betty and her mother became ill. Her mother died, and Betty was also thought to have died, and was taken to one of the out buildings and placed there. An uncle showed up to visit the sick child, and upon being told that she had died, he insisted on seeing her. He went out to see Betty and observed some signs of life, and she was nursed back to health. But with her mother gone, Betty’s father was overwhelmed with seven children and Betty and some of her siblings were placed in an orphanage. Betty spent a few years in the orphanage before an aunt and uncle took her in to live with them in Billings, Montana. One story that came from this time with the Ross’ was when her aunt and uncle went to New York and left Betty and her cousin, Lewis, to take care business in Billings. They had to collect rent and pay bills, but as teenagers with no supervision, they also made trips to a favorite destination in south Billings, where dances were held. Dancing was something Betty always enjoyed and was very good at, and later in life, Betty met her second husband, Bob Deaton, at a dance. After high school, Betty attended beauty school and became a beautician. She married and had a son, Vern. During the time between her first marriage and her second marriage, Betty went to Wyoming to work for a relative and spent a season cooking for an oil rig crew, and then returned to the Billings area. Betty met Bob Deaton at a dance, and they were married. This was during World War II, and Bob was soon shipped overseas, and Betty and her small son lived in Laurel, Montana until Bob returned. One experience Vern remembers was of sitting outside their home in Laurel. They were just watching the trees blow in the breeze when Betty remarked that a green apple pie sure would taste good. Vern took note of what his mother had said, rounded up a friend and they wandered around town, stealing green apples off trees so his mother could make that pie. Betty made the pie, and Vern says although he and his mother enjoyed it, Bob would not eat the pie; he was upset that Vern had stolen the apples. After the war, Bob eventually became employed by Northern Pacific Transport, and drove truck for the railroad for many years. Bob loved trucking but it did take him away from home for days at a time. When he did come home between runs, Betty was totally devoted to Bob. One of the special little things she would do for him was to heat his dinner plate before serving him, so his food would stay warm while they visited over dinner. Chris, one of the relatives who would come to visit and stay with Betty and Bob, observed that Betty and Bob seemed to really love each other and treated each other with great kindness. Bob’s job as a trucker moved the family around quite a bit. When Vern was in high school, the family moved to Glendive. Betty worked in a beauty shop in the basement of the Jordan Hotel. Vern graduated from high school in Glendive, married Karen and began a family of his own. After a few years, Betty and Bob relocated to western Montana, again going where Bob’s job took him. Betty and Bob loved to fish and camp the rivers and lakes of Montana. And they enjoyed playing cribbage. They generally had a pet cat, usually Siamese, with the most memorable one being a cat called Chang. Grandson Doug clearly remembers Chang. Doug says: “That cat did not like me. He was a full blood Siamese and he was their baby. Naturally when I showed up there was rivalry for attention. I’m not sure who received the most. I do remember getting in trouble a few times for some surely, unintended slight to the cat. Whenever we went somewhere, the cat came along. He had a litter box in the back of the car. Grandpa and Grandma never had big cars so the litter, the cat, and I were best friends. I am not a big fan of litter boxes to this day. During one adventure in Butte, Grandpa and Grandma took Chang out for a little wilderness adventure. Grandpa was sure he had the cat trained to respond to one of those silent whistles. I think we spent several hours in the woods outside of Butte looking for the stupid cat. I am sure Grandma would have been crushed had he not returned. I on the other hand, would not have been saddened if it was just the litter box and me on the way home.” Late in Betty’s life, Vern and Karen moved Betty to Glendive to be near them. Karen had been given a Persian cat named Smokey, and when Vern and Karen went on vacation, they asked Betty to cat sit. When they returned, and stopped to pick up Smokey, Betty commented that she was going to miss the cat. Karen thought it would be a great idea for Betty to keep Smokey, and Betty agreed. Once again Betty had a cat to keep her company. It was mentioned earlier that Betty and Bob moved around quite a bit because of Bob’s job. But no matter where they lived, the welcome mat was always out for those who wished to come and visit and stay. The grandkids would come and stay in the summers, especially Doug, who spent a great deal of time with his grandmother. The following are some of Doug’s favorite memories of his time with his grandma. “When I was 9 or ten years old, I started spending summers with my grandparents. At the time, they lived in Butte, MT. It was quite a distance from Glendive to Butte and since my grandpa worked for the Northern Pacific railroad, grandma and I took the train from Glendive to Butte. That was a huge adventure for me. The train didn’t go all of the way to Butte, so we had to get off at Logan, MT and we rode a bus over the mountains from Logan to Butte. I remember that grandpa was the bus driver that took us from Logan to Butte. Grandma always made the trip special by pointing out interesting things along the way. During the summers when I stayed in Butte, it was always exciting when Grandpa was home for a while because we got to play tourist. Both Grandpa and Grandma liked to fish so we toured the rivers of Western Montana. They taught me or tried to teach me patience at a little trout fishing pond near Virginia City. I don’t think Grandpa ever thought I would learn how to keep the worm in the water, but Grandma kept working with me. During one very hot day, we took a trip up the Jefferson River. Grandma and I fished close to the road. But grandpa always wandered up or down the stream. After a few hours, maybe minutes, Grandma and I (probably me) were fished out. We walked back to the car. We had no keys and the car was an old VW beetle with no creature comforts. We sat in the car for hours waiting for Grandpa to come back. Every now and then, Grandma would honk the horn. He finally showed up and with the biggest trout I had ever seen. It turns out he had heard the horn, but was in the middle of fighting this big fish. I think all was forgiven. The summers I spent with my grandparents were always special. Grandma and I spent a lot of time together because grandpa was on the road a lot. She used to tell me stories about grandpa’s time in the Army during World War II. The stories always fascinated me and I remember them to this day. During the days she kept me busy with plastic models or toy cars and trucks. I wasn’t allowed to wander far from the apartment, (this was lawless Butte), but I did explore the shed out back. I also found out you could crawl under the foundation of the apartment. During one exploration, I found the cover for a dynamite box. I was convinced from that day on that the apartment was located over a mineshaft and we could fall in at any time. Later, when they moved to Absarokee, MT. I spent a few summers there as well.” Granddaughter Amby also remembers summer visits to her grandparents. Amby especially enjoyed when the rest of the family would go camping and she had her grandparents to herself. She calls her grandmother a pleaser, always looking to make sure everyone was happy. And Amby loved her grandmother’s gentle ways. She liked when her grandparents would take her around the area showing her the sights. A special memory for Amby was going to Virginia City to wander the old town and go to the melodrama. A special cousin, Marjorie Ross, had a close relationship with Betty over the years. Marjorie’s children also spent time with Betty and Bob. Betty was known as Aunt (Ant) Betty and was a favorite. Aunt Betty always welcomed them with open arms, and sincerely enjoyed their stays. Betty was always happy and cheerful, generous and thoughtful to them. Marjorie’s daughter Chris says she always wanted to go and visit Aunt Betty. Another daughter, Irene, when staying with Aunt Betty threatened not to come home. Marjorie had to use the excuse of a pending appointment to get Irene to agree to come home. That was probably the stay when Betty had given Irene blue paint and let her paint the walls of the house. Marjorie’s son, Walt, came home from a visit to Betty’s with quite the round cheeks, having put on some obvious pounds while visiting. Marjorie, concerned, called Betty to find out what had happened. Betty simply said that Walt had the habit of eating a good dinner, and then finishing it off with a peanut butter sandwich. It was pretty much a case of Betty spoiling the kids when they visited. Grandson Doug probably spent the most time with his grandmother, and they surely enjoyed each other’s company and had a special relationship. Doug found his grandmother very accepting and loving. In later years, Doug would still visit whenever possible bringing his wife, Judy and family with him. One summer a family reunion was held a relative’s in White Sulphur Springs, MT. Betty was already there when Doug and Judy and their young family arrived. People were gathered and conversation flowing. Betty was sitting quietly a bit out of the flow of conversation. Doug and Judy’s daughter, Katrina, who was two years old at the time, spotted her great-grandmother and immediately went to her and crawled into her lap. Judy remembers how Betty’s face lit up; the child had made her day. On another visit, Betty and Bob took Doug and Judy to eat at a favorite restaurant. Judy was pregnant with her 2nd child and she and Doug had been tossing around different names for the baby, both boys’ and girls’ names. As they walked into the restaurant, the sign overhead read, “Land of Magic Restaurant”, Logan, Montana. They decided to name their child Logan if it was a boy. The child was a girl, but the next one was a son whom they christened “Logan”. Doug’s daughter, Brianna’s, middle name is Elizabeth, and Brianna’s daughter’s middle name is Elizabeth also, Amelia Elizabeth, to honor Betty. Speaking of names, Betty had several nicknames. Family who knew her as a child called her Bessie. Dick Buscis says that Betty once told him she didn’t like that name, it reminded her of a cow, even though they did not intend it that way. Husband Bob called Betty, “Shorty.” But most people knew her as Betty, her preferred choice. Betty was a wonderful cook. Vern and Karen said the only thing they could remember not liking was a Hungarian chicken dish that Betty would make. She made great soups and stews. Doug recalls that in high school the family used to take trips up into the mountains near Absarokee. He says it was always good to come down out of the mountains and know that Grandma’s house was a stopping off point. Doug will always remember her chicken noodle soup; “it was the best!” Betty had a couple things she really enjoyed doing. One was smoking. Betty began at an early age and smoked heavily throughout her life. Even when it became known how bad it could be for you, she refused to give it up. When Bob went on oxygen and Betty cared for him, she smoked. That scared the family; they were sure she would blow them both up. Another favorite activity was socializing at the local VFW clubs. Here is Doug’s version: “I remember that grandpa and grandma always had the coolest friends because they were usually old veterans, VFW members. They met and talked in the bars of small town Montana. They used to tell all kinds of stories in the taverns. But the best part for me was the bar food – beef jerky, pickled sausage, slim jims, and bottomless glasses of Coke or my ultimate favorite, Shirley Temples. I know it wasn’t the healthiest life style, but it sure was fun.” When Betty came back to Glendive, she continued to socialize at the VFW club. Vern and Karen would encourage her to go to the Senior Citizens Center for their activities, but Betty would retort that that was for old people, and she continued going to the VFW. Betty made the decision on her own to quite driving and she would not ride the bus. But every Tuesday, a friend would take her to the VFW for her social time. Betty really enjoyed that. Karen recalls that Betty had an interesting habit. Betty would often whistle while she did things. It wasn’t a recognizable tune, just something playing in Betty’s mind. Although Betty was 97 years old, she held her age very well. She always did her own hair, even insisting on doing it herself in the nursing home. She had a favorite colored mousse she used and fixing her hair was an important part of her day. For the greater share of her life, Betty lived independently. The move to the Eastern Montana Veterans Home was very difficult for her. But for all the tough times, for all the struggles, even though Betty may have been angry with the way something went, she was never, as Chris put it, bitter. It was more Betty’s nature to be cheerful and loving, to please, to enjoy life. And it is these characteristics for which Betty will be remembered. Betty touched many lives; she is greatly loved and will be greatly missed. Let us now remember Betty’s touch on our hearts as we listen to the song, “The Old Rugged Cross”. Song: “The Old Rugged Cross” Closing: Celebrant There is no way that in the minutes we have spent remembering Betty that we can come close to telling of 97 years of living. But the planning of Betty’s life tribute service is an act of love by Vern and Karen and all of Betty’s family. They have revisited memories and places in their heart touched by Betty, and shared them today so that we can all understand that a “life lived is a life never to be forgotten.” Betty will be remembered for examples set, for lessons taught and learned, for concerns felt, for love shared, for the touch of a hand, for smiles sent our way, for words of encouragement to lift the spirit, for all that she was during life. Just as Betty’s family celebrates the attributes that made Betty special, unique, and loved, they grieve the loss of her as a mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, cousin and aunt. Vern, Karen, Doug, Amby and all of Betty’s family, as your friends and your community, we grieve with you and we grieve for you. As William Wordsworth said, “ the best portion of a person’s life are their little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and love.” Thank you Betty for the kindness and love you brought to our world. As we conclude Betty Deaton’s life tribute service, may each of you here today know that your presence has honored Betty. As we listen to the song “Amazing Grace”, let us send a wish to Betty that she may rest in peace. Thank you for being here for this important time. Song: “Amazing Grace”

Elizabeth "Betty" Deaton

June 17, 1912 - July 2, 2009

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Elizabeth "Betty" Deaton

June 17, 1912 - July 2, 2009

What We Do

Flowers & Gifts

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Grief & Healing

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